The question of the day may well be, Are men without children impacted by generic ‘Happy Father’s Day!’ wishes in the way that many women are at Mother’s Day?
It’s clear from comments to this blog that many men are sincerely concerned about the emotional health of the woman in their life when tears flow related to their NotMom status. But, what about the men themselves? It’s in a woman’s DNA to talk about her feelings; not so much with the male gender.
As for celeb NotDads, are they even asked about their parental status that much? Were people in Jay-Z’s face about having a baby to the level that they pried into Beyonce’s business? Comedians Ricky Gervais, Steve Martin, Jay Leno and Bill Maher are all NotDads. Did you even know? Actor Hill Harper. Commentator Tavis Smiley. Children’s author Dr. Seuss.
Perhaps we know about George Clooney and Jon Hamm’s feelings on the matter perhaps because female fans want such good-looking men to reproduce!
Mr. Clooney, 51, has described himself as “selfish” and “nervous” around kids. He told Britain’s OK! Magazine:
“I know I’m not ready for that kind of life. I’ve settled into a very comfortable lifestyle and I really don’t want to change things.”
“I’m in a committed relationship, and if it ever came up, I’m not ruling it out. there’s a reason it hasn’t been prioritized, because I don’t think either of us has that pull. I don’t know; it could happen tomorrow. I have no clue,” Mr. Hamm said.
Girlfriend Jennifer told The NY Times in March:
“I never thought I’d be this age and not have kids. But my life has also gone in a million ways I never anticipated. I kept feeling like I’d wake up with absolute clarity, and I haven’t. And we have a pretty great life together. The chance that we’ll regret it doesn’t seem like a compelling enough reason to do it.”
These celeb comments mirror those made by everyday guys every day, but not in a spotlight. Guys in general aren’t eager to share personal stuff, especially in public. And, as is often the case, people who are organically content with a no-kids life are more vocal about it than others with recurring melancholy or regret.
So, how to gauge or guess how the male side of the ‘no kids’ equation fares on a day all about parents? The same way that NotMoms want to be seen ourselves: one at a time, case by case, person by individual person.