Â â¢ MOMFRIENDS:Â NotMoms offering unsolicited parenting advice can be walking a perilous path, but it can be a case-by-case thing, too. Even with an accepting Momfriend, presentation matters. âWhy donât you do such-and-suchâ may not be heard as well as âWhat if you did such-and-suchâ instead. Read More
Â â¢ GRANDKID GUILT:Â By-choice NotMoms who are their parentsâ only child may have presented their own parents with no-grandkids reality, but future in-laws are another challenge entirely. The weight of the news shouldnât fallÂ only on the person with the uterus.Â Read More
â¢Â WEDDINGS:Â Women without a date, mate or a child may not be expecting the happy event to be very happy for them at all, and thatâs a shame. Preparation is the key. A new dress is the easiest part; of course youâll be the best looking female there. Â The toughest challenge is inside your head. Read More
Give moral support to couples who choose to make their ceremonyÂ or reception âAdults Only.âMore than a few parents can be upset by this decision, perceiving it as a rejection of themselves and their children. In most cases, the newlyweds arenâtÂ anti-child, but they are budget-conscious.
âWhat a strange questionâ was my first thought. My real answer is simple and feels very true: A childless marriage is like a celebration of love. Whatâs yours?
â¢Â GIRLFRIENDS:Â Research has found that women are calmed by the very act of hanging with girlfriends. Â Females respond to stress by releasing a hormone called oxytocin, you see, and by befriending Â each other, we generate even more of it. Â (When men are stressed, they produce high levels of testosterone. Whoâs surprised that testosterone negates Â the soothing benefits of oxytocin?)
â¢Â LOOKING FOR LOVE:Â Â Super-sized dating sites like Match.comÂ and OK CupidÂ offer a âchildlessâ filter to review people without children only. Thereâs also a free dating/networking site,Â No Kids Passions, part of the niche-focused Passions Network. But, some NotMoms report slim pickings.Â What advice can you share with women (and men) about finding compatible dates online?
â¢Â HEALTHY HOOK-UPS: Relationships can be hard work, whether theyâre romantic or simply social. Comedian (and NotMom) Chelsea Handler shares the best advice she ever received on sustaining personal connections:
â¢Â FINDING FRIENDS:Â Parents,Â fatigued, stressed and all the rest,Â enjoy various opportunities for newÂ interactions with peers, but geography and other factors can cause NotMoms to work a little harder to find each other,Â In 2008, a Denver woman wondered why she couldnât find girlfriends the same wayÂ Match.comÂ finds dates. Her solution:Â SocialJane.com.Â Post a profile and search the database. Â Also for women only:Â GirlfriendCirclesÂ andÂ Girlfriend SocialÂ andÂ Girlfriendology.
â¢Â NOT DADS: About theÂ same proportionsÂ of men and women in a 2012 British study said they wanted kids (59 percent of men and 63percent of women). Among that group, half of the men said they experienced âisolationâ because they werenât dads, while just over a quarter of women said the same about lack of Mom-hood. All that prattle about feminine hormones? Out the window. If you want to be a parent and youâre not one, it can hurt. Gender doesnât really matter. Read more
â¢Â PITY, ENVY & REGRET:Â Â Beyond the demographic where people still question the choice to beÂ childless, weÂ move on to new perceptions which come in three general forms; regret, pity, and envy. Assumptions of how weâll feel in the future, or envy for the lifestyle we enjoy.Â Read More